All Human beings, by natural instinct they get emotions or feel the impact of various emotions in daily life. To learn the science of Emotional intelligence or Management of emotions, initially we shall know the ‘source’ or ‘origin’ of emotions. Then only we could able to manage the emotions.
As earlier said in previous chapters, the Emotions play in ‘Dual nature’. Except in sound sleep (without dreams) or in deep meditation, we are almost engaged in one or other emotions. All emotions have stimulus from outside for their manifestation. This stimuli may be material objects or people or natural elements.
There are fundamental basic human instincts which become cause or source for emotions. These are as follows;
Desire, Fear, Love
In the above said, the first two are negative traits and Love is positive trait. ‘Desire is the root cause of all sorrows’ as Gouthama Buddha said. If Human desires are fulfilled people become Happy if not they become Unhappy. Sometimes ‘Anger’ is also an offshoot of Desire if it is not fulfilled. Anger leads to imbalance in intellect & thereby causing Distress. Same is applied in positive sense; the fulfillment of desire makes people Happy & Joy and feels the Pleasures and thereby gets delighted.
Fear always gives rise to all the negative emotions. Fear makes people Distressed and it and discourages to take right decisions. People get afraid off petty things, so develop suspicion themselves for everything which in turn leads to Anguish. If there is no Fear, all the positive emotional traits would replace the above like encourages individuals to take bold decisions, so belief, trust drive the people to do better things which results in Pride and Appreciation.
‘Love’ is the universal common feeling; the opposite is the ‘Hatred’. Every Human being on the Earth has two sides of this feeing. Everyone has love for some people & things around them and similarly hates some people & things. It is liking & disliking. We have like for something and dislike for something. Both love and hatred are two sides of the same coin.
The impact of emotions on human mind is like day & night fall or arrival of various seasons. No individual is always in the same state of single emotion. All the emotions are ‘transitory’ they and go. If a certain thing or work is not done as desired by us, we feel unhappy or get despair. When the same thing or work is done we feel happy and delighted. Same thing applies to Pain & Pleasure.
Therefore taking into account of all the above, it is widely accepted truth that an individual who would become aware of the ‘dual nature’ of Emotions will not be entangled in the vicious circle formed by them in our lives.
We can never avoid the inevitable impact of emotions in every human life. This is because of the Mind activity which always in the continuous process of thinking and resulted in thoughts, actions & finally the effects of those again felt by the individuals in the form of emotions.
The management of Emotions lies in controlling the mind activity with the help of ‘Intelligence’. The Intelligence helps in finding the source or origin of the emotion. Generally it is generated through the mind activity of which there are both positive & negative thoughts. The Intelligence by discriminating between for what kind of thoughts and actions one should adopt gives the decision. Then it is advisable to follow the decision made by Intelligence not to follow what Mind activity decides.
The Intelligence can discriminate the Good & Evil things around us. So which desire is to be fulfilled with in our range and which could not be. This thin line of sensitivity in thought process can give intellectual strength to us and thereby we can manage emotions.